


Lost Things

by punk_assnerd



Series: Stories from me [9]
Category: Original Work
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-02-04
Updated: 2018-02-04
Packaged: 2019-03-13 13:34:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,247
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13571613
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/punk_assnerd/pseuds/punk_assnerd





	Lost Things

Waking up to the sound of rain wasn't at all unnatural from where I came from. Waking up and getting a bit wet from an open window? Not at all (since I never close the damn thing).  
But waking up under the rain? Maybe not so natural.  
Even for me.

To wake up in a park bench ( I'm assuming its a bench and that I am in a park.) with a pounding in my head was just weird.  
What's even more weird is that I see a blurry swing set as I open my eyes. Wait, blurry?!  
Oh crap.  
Where are my glasses?  
I scrambled up, causing the pounding in my head to do an encore performance.  
Now I'm panicking even more when I realize three more things.

1\. My right shoe was missing, leaving my right foot unprotected by the cold, save for my black socks.

2\. I'm shirtless under my hoodie. I could feel the smoothness of my jacket rubbing my, now, wet neck and chest.  
3\. (This is by far my favorite) I am basically twenty feet away from my ex boyfriends house.  
Which also meant that I am a thirty-minute-drive away from my own comfy, cozy, and dry house.  
Such a wonderful way to start the day.

Groaning, I sat up straight on the bench only to feel the world swirl around me. Which lead me to another amazing conclusion,  
I'm drunk as hell.

Well, I'm assuming... Considering I don't even know what being drunk feels like.

Yes. I'm an 18 year old guy who doesn't get batshit drunk every Friday night.  
Sue me.

I sat there, eyes closed and head thrown back as I slouch on the bench, wallowing in my misery for what feels like a year only to feel the rain stop.  
But the sound of rain heavily falling never stopped. Weird.  
I opened my right eye only to see what I swore I would never see again.  
Dazzling blue eyes that once looked at me with such longing but was now filled with pity.  
Dark hair even darker because of the wetness in the air leaving it a mess on top of his head.  
And then his whole appearance seems to pop out. Covered in a sweater too big and sweatpants too small for him. Holding up a black umbrella over both of our heads.

"You're an idiot." He breathed out

Yeah but I'm your idiot. "I know"

"We have got to stop meeting like this. Why are you still here? I told you to go home Devon."

Devon? Ouch

"I dont even know. I can't remember anything. And my head feels like someone jacked me up with a baseball bat. And my shoe is missing. And my shirt is gone. And my ex is probably judging me right now."

He shook his head and smiled slightly as he took a seat next to me.  
"I'm not judging you. I'm trying to figure you out."

"Can you figure me out inside your house? Please?"

He then looked straight ahead as his jaw visibly clenched and shook his head, bitting his bottom lip.  
"I am probably gonna regret this"

He then looked at me and gave me his hand. "C'mon"

I grabbed his hand and got up only to feel my knees buckle from under me and I ended up grabbing for his shoulder. The action caught him off guard and... Well, we might've ended up lying on the wet floor of a park.

"Alright. I'm already regretting this."

Then everything kinda just blurred together.  
Him lifting me over his shoulder, him dropping me on a couch, him undressing me except from my boxers, him drying me up and dressing me up with clothes that are probably mine, drinking some revolting thing, spitting out said revolting thing, and then everything went black and still and quiet.

\----

Waking up warm and tangled up with someone as rain poured down was how I usually wake up three months ago. A mess of black hair tickling my chin and warm, soft hands rubbing my back from inside my shirt.

All of this was how I woke up for a year.

But waking up like this now is just so out of the ordinary that it almost looked like a dream.

A dream I don't want to wake up from.

"Evo?"  
His voice was soft and muffled from the sweater I'm wearing.  
"Yeah?"  
"Yesterday, at around midnight. You kept throwing rocks at my window, screaming how stupid you were for breaking up with me."  
And this is why I don't drink.  
"And then our neighbor told you that he'll call the police if you threw one more rock. So instead of throwing a rock you threw your-"

"I threw my shoe... Didn't i?"

"Yup. Then something soft hit the window after that, which I'm gonna assume was your shirt."  
He giggled a bit and then silence seems to have filled up the room.

We were never quiet.

Whenever were together he would either rant about some band he's obsessed with or I annoy the shit out of him until he agrees to make out with me. We never suffocate through awkward tension and violent silence.  
"This reminds me of that one band you told me about. The one with just two guys."  
This was also another thing we had. We blurt out things we remind each other of or situations that reminds me of one of his bands.  
"Twenty one pilots?"  
"I don't know. The one with the lyrics 'sometimes quiet is violent' or something like that."

"Oh."

He wrapped his arms tighter around me and then asked the one question I've always avoided.

"Did you mean it?"

I tried my best not to tense up but as usual, I did.

"Mean what?"

"What you said yesterday? That you regret breaking up with me."

I tried my best not to choke up as I mumbled a small yes

But like every other yes or no question, there's always a but question.  
Like when you are asked if you hate chocolate and then after you answer a yes or no there's always a why or a why not.

"But why did you?"

\---

I first met him on a Saturday when I was twelve and stupid and lost.  
Skateboarding through streets and alleys until I don't even know where I was anymore. But I kept on going and going and going, until it got dark.  
Now if you were a twelve year old boy, lost in a big scary city, in the middle of the night, what would you do?  
Probably cry until someone sees you then help you go to the police or something right? Well, I didn't. I went to the brightest place i could see and stayed there.

Which happened to be a park.

I stayed there for hours, running around, skating some more, and even playing at the swing set and slide. Well, I did, until it started raining.  
I hid under the slide as it was the only thing I can use as a shelter at the park and hugged my board. I stayed there and shivered for hours and waited for my cold death until some kid in a pair of orange Buzz Lightyear pajamas appeared in front of me.  
He was balancing a black umbrella that was a little bit too big for him on his right hand and he was carrying a coat on his left hand.

"Are you new here?" He said

"What?"

"I said Are you new here? Because this is the first time I saw someone under the slide."

"I don't live here. I just got lost.  
And, you saw me? From where?"

"There!" He pointed at some apartment squeezed between two bigger ones. As he turned and pointed, the coat fell from his grasp and flopped on the wet ground.  
"Dang it! I was supposed to give this to you! Hey. Since you don't live here, wanna stay over my place?"

"You don't even know me."

"Then introduce yourself!" He grabbed my arm and pulled me out from under the slide. Then a pair of the bluest eyes I have ever seen met my gaze.  
"Oh, uhm. I'm Devon. But you can call me Evo, it's what my friend calls me."  
"Well Evo. I'm Dominic. But you can call me anything you want. I don't have any friends so I don't have a nickname yet."  
"Why don't you have friends?"  
"Oh, uhm. I don't like talking to strangers that much."  
"Then why are you talking to me"  
"Because you don't usually see people under the slide!" He now dragged me in their apartment and lead me through the stairs and opened up a door to out left. "MOM! I FOUND SOMEONE UNDER THE PARK SLIDE!"

"What?!"

Then a middle aged lady with the same pair of blue eyes came out from the kitchen and stared at me.

"Honey, who's that?"

"Oh. He's Evo. I found him under the park slide"

Her mom then looked at her son and then back at me and then went straight for the telephone and dialed for someone. "Oh honey?" Se turned back to Dominic "Can you please dry up our guest while I call the police? His mom is probably worried."  
"Ok. C'mon! I'll show you my room!"  
He then hauled me to a room with huge windows facing the park, street lamps and moonlight seeps through thin curtains making his room dark but still visible.  
He gave me a bunch of clothes and towels and then left me on my own to change. After that I came out of the room only to see him waiting for me and then dragged me down to the dining table again.  
His mom came out of what I thought was probably the kitchen and sat next to me.  
"Hey, Devon right?"  
"Uh huh"  
"Well it looks like your mom already filed a report and is on her way here with the police. You gave her quiet a fright."  
"Oh. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to."  
"It's alright honey. Just apologize to her later and promise to never do it again. Now. Why don't we all eat dinner while we wait."  
After an hour of eating the best Mac and cheese of my life and Dominic rambling about something he read about a boy under the stairs and exclaiming maybe you're the chosen one, the buzzer rang and his mom got up and buzzed them in.  
A minute later the door opened with my mom half crying and half laughing as she saw me and then ran to me only to cry some more.  
The door was then filled with police officers and my mom thanked them and they all got out and said goodnight.  
I then introduced mom to both Dominic and his mom and then my mom hugged Dominic's mom. And kept thanking her. She then told mom that Dominic was actually the one who found me and that she should thank him. Mom then knelt next to Dominic's chair and said "Thank you so so much for helping my baby."  
"It's ok. I just thought he looked cold so I went to give him my coat, only I dropped my coat and I couldn't give him a wet coat. So that's when I invited him in after I asked for his name. Because you can't just invite someone you don't know inside your house."

All this seems to amuse mom.  
After my mom and his mom talked some more and we ate dinner, mom thanked them again and said we need to go home.  
"Can we go back tomorow?"  
Mom then hesitated a bit and kneeled down to my height.  
"I don't know, love. They're a bit far from where we live. Maybe next satuday? Would you like that?"  
"Ok"  
"Ok." She kissed my forehead and then got up and faced Dominic's mom "Thank you again Linda, and thanks again Dominic. We'll come back next week ok?"  
"OK. Just make sure he doesn't leave you again." Dominic said and it seemed to be funny to both of our moms.  
"I promise. Say goodbye Evo."  
"Bye. And thank you for the Mac and cheese! It was awesome! Bye Nic!"  
"Nic?" Dominic seemed confused at first  
"You said call you anything I want right? And besides, Dominic is such a long name."  
He seemed amused by this and smiled brightly.  
Mom then hailed a cab and on the way home I imagined how next week would be. To hang out with Nic again.

And that how it was for years, until I was sixteen. After that I just went on my own and sometimes even stay the night.

And that was how my life went until after two years. That was when Nic turned 18.  
Mom and I went to surprise Nic and all four of us had fun on the park with blue cake a bit too much because I ended up with frosting inside my shirt and Nic has blue spots on his pants.  
We went inside to clean up a bit. Laughing all through out the time we were cleaning up in his bathroom. Then as I was wiping off frosting from my chest a loud thud came behind me only to see Nic falling on top of me.  
But instead of getting up, we just stayed there. Staring at each other.  
That was until he grabbed my face and connected his lips with mine.  
At fist I was thinking about how he tasted like vanilla frosting and then my mind freaked out as if saying 'you are kissing your best friend and all you could think about was that he tasted like vanilla?!'

I then realized that I might have froze up and not kissed back which lead to Nic getting up and mumbling small sorry's as he headed for the door.  
"Wait!"  
"What...?"  
I then got up and pulled him back.  
"That's not fair!"  
"What..?"  
"You get to kiss me but I don't get to kiss you?"  
"But I though yo-"  
Maybe kissing him mid sentence was a bad idea, but I just really love vanilla.

Maybe both of our moms found us making out in his bed.  
Maybe I was shirtless and he wasn't wearing any pants.  
And maybe, after both of our moms just closed the door, we just made out more until I fell asleep with a blue eyed, black haired, and vanilla smelling guy.  
And maybe I asked him to be my boyfriend in the morning. Who cares right?

But after a year of his constant cuddling.  
After a year of his band obsessed rants.  
After a year of him wearing my shirts.  
Maybe I got tired of all of it.  
Or maybe I was overwhelmed with all of it.

And maybe I did cry myself to sleep after I broke up with the boy who save me from under the park slide. Maybe my mom asked why I stayed home every Saturday from then on.  
And maybe I still have his number on my phone and I still stare at my pictures of him sleeping.  
Who cares right?

Well. I do.

And maybe it was my self loathing or my misery finally clouded my judgement but either way, it lead to me looking for a bar somewhere far from our house with one goal and one goal only.

To get so drunk I forget my own name.

Because I know for sure that no alcohol is gonna make me forget his.

\--

"But why did you?"

"Honestly, I don't know."  
"At first I thought you were suffocating me and annoying me with your constant attention and everything.. Like, you were always there. And..  
But then when I didn't have you, all I wanted was for you to annoy me again. I just.. I dont.. I'm just lost with all of this.."

He then loosened his grip on me and shifted up a bit, until his nose was an inch away from my lips. Blue eyes so blue they seem to shine unnaturally. Hair as messy as ever and skin paler than before.

"You've always been lost Evo. Even after I found you you were still lost..."

"Wha-" he covered my mouth with his hand and said "let me finish."

"You never know what you wanted or what you wanted to do. Everything we do... Or did, was something I have to initiate. The thing was... Is, is that I only did what I did because that's how I am when I'm in a relationship. Everything I do before heightens and if you couldn't handle that then maybe you couldnt... Maybe you wouldn't be able to be anything more than just my... friend."

The way he said it was so soft that it was almost impossible for my to feel and offense to that at all. Like trying to talk soothingly to a deer you're about to shoot. And as the deer just slowly calms down you wait for the right moment to pull the trigger and..

"But is that so bad?"

But the shot never came.

"Was us being friends meant nothing to you that you're willing to not try us being friends again?"

"You can never stay friends with your ex.."

"You won't be able to if you keep thinking about the things that made you breakup. The things that ended what you could've had.  
So stop. Stop thinking about me constantly on you. How I annoyed you till I eventually broke past all of your boundaries. And think of the times you and me had fun! When you enjoyed times where I annoyed you. When you annoyed me. When you willingly came to me."

The thing bout people with blue eyes is that when they cry and the white of their eyes gets all red and raw is that the blue seems to pop up even more.  
And right now.  
Seeing my bestfriend, my ex boyfriend, and my could've-been husband, his eyes had never been more blue as tears flood out from his eyes.  
He looked so vulnerable and tired. Like the weight of the world settled itself on his shoulders and now he's just letting it drag him down. And I swear I've seen that look before. And then it hit me.  
He looked lost. He looked so lost and he looked so much like me that it hurt. So I did what he always did for me.  
I grabbed his hand and leaned his head to my chest. I made sure he knows that I'm here for him, just like how he was always there for me.

After that the room was again filled with silence, but a different kind.  
Not like a flood were you feel like you're drowning in tension. More like a blanket of snow softly covering us, helping us get used to it before it completely covers us.

That night Nic's mom went to call for him only to find us both asleep in his bed.  
So she did what she always did whenever I accidentally falls asleep.

She dialed up a number she's memorized by heart by now. And after only a single ring, a very worried voice echoes on the other end of the line, frantically blurting out something about his son missing again.  
"Karen, calm down. Yeah, hi. Don't worry. Evo's fine, he's with Nic. He isn't lost at all."


End file.
